11
Sep
07

I Want Brangelina To Adopt Me

Angie & MaddoxWhat in the fuck..not only does Maddox Jolie (or is it Pitt? Whatever) attend a fancy pants $18,000 / year school taught in French, which is very practical when you live in an English speaking country, he also enjoys quite the King’s luncheon according to In Touch:

Fresh cod served with steamed broccoli and couscous. Or how about rotisserie chicken, green bean almandine, white rice and vegetable chunks soup?

What?!?!? Sure I eat similarly if you replace ‘fresh cod’ with ‘chicken of the sea’ and replace the fresh vegetables with the generic carrots and peas ‘veggie mix’ from Ralph’s, but c’mon!

I can be a good child, Angie. You should adopt me. I promise to only ogle you for no more than 5 hours a day. Seriously, think about it. I can wipe myself and use the toilet myself too. (usually)

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