Archive for October, 2007

31
Oct

Fergie’s Costume Is Brilliant!

fergieOh man! This has to be the best Halloween costume ever. Fergie is dressed as the girl who turned me down at the middle school dance in 1989 only the transvestite, packing a humongous dong version of that girl.

Wow, Fergie. Good one. Now get back to figuring out how you and Josh Duhamel are going to make babies with 2 people with penises having sex.

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31
Oct

Update: B.O.S. Award Repealed: Nicole Richie

Well, it looks like I might have to temporarily repeal the Bag of Shit award for the time being. It looks like Page 6, who always prattle on about how great of fact checkers they are, fucked up.

According to TMZ, Nicole has been overseas for most of the last 2 months despite Ciny Adams claiming Nicole Richie was in New York last weekend lighting up.

It’s possible the tip came from 2 months ago, the last time Nicole was in NYC. However, I’m guess it’s just another fuck up. Those New Yorkers are a little slow on the uptake. If you want to cover Hollywood, you should really be in Hollywood. ;)

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31
Oct

Jessica Simpson & Owen Wilson Dating?

simpsonIt looks like Owen Wilson is jumping back in the saddle. It appears he and Jessica Simpson are now an item. They had their first date on Sunday night. The Mirror reports:

Spies at the Huntley Hotel in Santa Monica saw them arrive separately and chat for over an hour before leaving.

Now Owen, when you dump this one too; stay away from the razors and pills and whatever else you have that can be lethal. There are other fish in the sea. For real. I’m not joking.

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31
Oct

I Need A Hero!: Ali Larter Edition

larterOh my…Heroes star, Ali Larter, is looking positively stunning here.

This is what a star is supposed to look like. Are you taking notes Brilohilton? No more streetwalker attire where one tit is flopping in the breeze and your nether region is there for all to see.

This is a star right here ladies & germs.

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30
Oct

Robert Goulet Passes Away

gouletRobert Goulet has succumb to his disease, a form of pulmonary fibrosis, which left his lungs non-functional.

A horrible horrible disease to die of. Essentially like drowning on dry land.

He has been a star of stage and screen ever since he was a child shortly after his birth in 1933.

He was 73 years old.

All of our condolences and prayers go out to the Goulet family in this difficult time.

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30
Oct

Catholic League Outrage…Again: Britney Spears Edition

Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.usThe Catholic League and blowhard dick nose, Bill Donohue in particular are trying to pull their panties out of their crack after seeing ‘controversial’ pictures from Britney Spears’ new album where she is dressed suggestively in the proximity of a priest. Donahue had this to say (via The Insider):

“This is all the puzzle pieces coming together. This girl is crashing,” BILL DONOHUE — president of the New York-based Catholic League — told the Daily News. “She’s not even allowed to bring up her own kids because she’s not responsible enough. Now we see she can’t even entertain.”

What the fuck does that have to do with this picture, Bill? Seriously. You are a walking non sequitur.

Now, looking at the picture, she is clearly at confession. So if she is a Jezebel, she’s in the right place, no? I mean, that is where your evils are absolved after all.

Listen, it’s a totally lame attempt at being shocking. However, these religious groups (I’m not just talking Christian groups) need to stuff a cock in it. Not everyone follows your voodoo rituals and believes in the same imaginary superheros you believe in. If someone wants to make fun of you, tough shit for you. Can’t you rest with the solace of knowing the infidel will be burning in hell if you are right? C’mon.

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30
Oct

Daniel ‘James Bond’ Craig Getting ‘F’ You Money

craigDaniel Craig made the smartest move of his life and resigned to do 4 more James Bond films.

Not only has he revitalized a bland franchise, he made it ‘cool’ once again.

Now, his wallet is going to be a bit more thicker than usual as he will receive just over $15 million per film with points on the back end.

I would be envious, but I am more happy with my fry chef level wages, because rich people aren’t happy and poor people are and…ahhh who the fuck are we kidding? He’s gotta be wiping his ass with $100 bills right now. Dammit.

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