LA LA LAndmine » Hero http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs Celebrity Gossip, Humor Thu, 09 Feb 2012 01:03:14 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 The pussies come one step closer to taking over: Charlton Heston dead at age 84 http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2008/04/06/the-pussies-come-one-step-closer-to-taking-over-charlton-heston-dead-at-age-84/ http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2008/04/06/the-pussies-come-one-step-closer-to-taking-over-charlton-heston-dead-at-age-84/#comments Sun, 06 Apr 2008 09:55:26 +0000 Manny http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2008/04/06/the-pussies-come-one-step-closer-to-taking-over-charlton-heston-dead-at-age-84/ charlton-heston-planet-of-the-ape.jpgIt is a sad, sad day for all men who still believe in being men. There was once a time when if a man looked at you sideways you asked him if he had something to say to you. If he was just spacing out he'd apologize and you buy each other a shot of whiskey and keep that fucking bar open until 4 a.m and chat up everything in a skirt that passed by your way. If he did have a problem, he'd own up to it and you'd step outside to duke it out a bit. No cheap shot bullshit, no pulling out knives or pistols if the other guy is throwing fists only. At the end of it all, you buy each other a shot of whiskey and keep that fucking bar open until 4 a.m. and chat up everything with a skirt that passed by your way. Charlton Heston was a throwback to a time when men didn't talk about connecting with their feminine side because they cut that son of a bitch out with a ka-bar knife fighitng commies or Nazis in some god forsaken shithole just because they needed something fun to do that year. He was a throwback to a time when if there was a raccoon fucking up your trash cans and harassing your dogs at all hours of the night you didn't call animal control and wait 4 hours for them to come hit it with the taser and gas it to death for you. You went in your house, pulled out your varmint rifle (which if you weren't a pussy you'd know how it's different from your average deer rifle) shoot the son of a bitch, skin it and have it for dinner the next day. He was from a time when if a guy cracked wise about your lady you punched him in the face or the gut no questions asked. No 'excuse me?' no, 'do you have a problem?' bullshit, you just punch him because if that guy still had anything resembling manhood left in him, he got up and dusted himself off realized he was out of line apologized with a tip of the proverbial hat and kept on walking knowing he deserved it and didn't called a lawyer to sue you over his bruised ego because he was acting like an asshole. He was from a time in Hollywood when films were epic and urgent and had to be to contain a personality the size of him. A time when the films were sweeping in their grandeur and their grit. No matter how stilted the dialog or how 'fake' the sets looked, you bought it because the actors pouring their hearts out on the screen believed it and wanted you to believe it and by golly you better believe you bought it. Many have come and gone since Chuck first hit the silver screen, but few ever matched the sheer massiveness of his screen persona or his gusto for his work. Now if you'll excuse me, while you are talking to your boyfriend about his feelings and reassuring him that it's OK that he cried at the end of that last episode of The Hills I'm going to tip a beer to one of the last of a dying breed. Some day a child will walk by in a museum and point up and ask, "Mommie, what is that?" She'll look at her daughter and say, "That's a man, dear. There used to be some of them around once." And they'll be pointing at statue of Chuck Heston. If you really need all the details of how and why he passed away, click HERE. His filmography is HERE. Now go out and rent Major Dundee. ]]> charlton-heston-planet-of-the-ape.jpgIt is a sad, sad day for all men who still believe in being men.

There was once a time when if a man looked at you sideways you asked him if he had something to say to you. If he was just spacing out he’d apologize and you buy each other a shot of whiskey and keep that fucking bar open until 4 a.m and chat up everything in a skirt that passed by your way.

If he did have a problem, he’d own up to it and you’d step outside to duke it out a bit. No cheap shot bullshit, no pulling out knives or pistols if the other guy is throwing fists only. At the end of it all, you buy each other a shot of whiskey and keep that fucking bar open until 4 a.m. and chat up everything with a skirt that passed by your way.

Charlton Heston was a throwback to a time when men didn’t talk about connecting with their feminine side because they cut that son of a bitch out with a ka-bar knife fighitng commies or Nazis in some god forsaken shithole just because they needed something fun to do that year.

He was a throwback to a time when if there was a raccoon fucking up your trash cans and harassing your dogs at all hours of the night you didn’t call animal control and wait 4 hours for them to come hit it with the taser and gas it to death for you. You went in your house, pulled out your varmint rifle (which if you weren’t a pussy you’d know how it’s different from your average deer rifle) shoot the son of a bitch, skin it and have it for dinner the next day.

He was from a time when if a guy cracked wise about your lady you punched him in the face or the gut no questions asked. No ‘excuse me?’ no, ‘do you have a problem?’ bullshit, you just punch him because if that guy still had anything resembling manhood left in him, he got up and dusted himself off realized he was out of line apologized with a tip of the proverbial hat and kept on walking knowing he deserved it and didn’t called a lawyer to sue you over his bruised ego because he was acting like an asshole.

He was from a time in Hollywood when films were epic and urgent and had to be to contain a personality the size of him. A time when the films were sweeping in their grandeur and their grit. No matter how stilted the dialog or how ‘fake’ the sets looked, you bought it because the actors pouring their hearts out on the screen believed it and wanted you to believe it and by golly you better believe you bought it.

Many have come and gone since Chuck first hit the silver screen, but few ever matched the sheer massiveness of his screen persona or his gusto for his work.

Now if you’ll excuse me, while you are talking to your boyfriend about his feelings and reassuring him that it’s OK that he cried at the end of that last episode of The Hills I’m going to tip a beer to one of the last of a dying breed.

Some day a child will walk by in a museum and point up and ask, “Mommie, what is that?”

She’ll look at her daughter and say, “That’s a man, dear. There used to be some of them around once.”

And they’ll be pointing at statue of Chuck Heston.

If you really need all the details of how and why he passed away, click HERE.

His filmography is HERE. Now go out and rent Major Dundee.

Similar Posts: ]]> http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2008/04/06/the-pussies-come-one-step-closer-to-taking-over-charlton-heston-dead-at-age-84/feed/ 2 Touch Of Evel http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/12/01/touch-of-evel/ http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/12/01/touch-of-evel/#comments Sat, 01 Dec 2007 16:00:13 +0000 Manny http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/12/01/touch-of-evel/ [youtube SLURFJQGeZE]

Hardcore. From his first 'retirement' after trying to jump 13 double decker buses in front of 80,000 spectators at Wembley Stadium in England. He doesn't make it. Not too graphic, but still, if you don't like spectacular crashes, stay away.

[youtube Gg9Hrp0CVms]

2 more after the break including the famous 'snake river canyon' jump

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[youtube w38d9XeZ2Gg]

]]> Just a few Evel Knievel videos for you to check out. Ahhh…memories.

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Hardcore. From his first ‘retirement’ after trying to jump 13 double decker buses in front of 80,000 spectators at Wembley Stadium in England. He doesn’t make it. Not too graphic, but still, if you don’t like spectacular crashes, stay away.

[There is a video that cannot be displayed in this feed. Visit the blog entry to see the video.]

2 more after the break including the famous ‘snake river canyon’ jump

[There is a video that cannot be displayed in this feed. Visit the blog entry to see the video.]

[There is a video that cannot be displayed in this feed. Visit the blog entry to see the video.]

Similar Posts: ]]> http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/12/01/touch-of-evel/feed/ 0 Evel Knievel Dead At 69 http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/12/01/evel-knieval-dead-at-69/ http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/12/01/evel-knieval-dead-at-69/#comments Sat, 01 Dec 2007 12:18:03 +0000 Manny http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/12/01/evel-knieval-dead-at-69/ Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.usWorld famous stuntman and daredevil Evel Knievel passed away on Friday. People Magazine reports:
Knievel had been in frail health for some time. Speaking to USA Today earlier this year, Knievel – crippled with arthritis, recovering from a stroke and aching from his decades of bodily injuries he'd earned while performing – admitted he no longer felt invincible, as he had in his youth. "I think about God a lot more than ever," he said, "though I used to ask him, 'Help me make a good jump.' I'm awfully tough to get along with, but I'll tell you what: I am a good person. I wish there was such a thing as reincarnation." "If there is a heaven, I don't know anything else I can do to get there," he told the interviewer, "and neither do you." Among his survivors are sons Kelly and Robbie Knievel, daughters Alicia and Tracey, 11 grandchildren and ex-wives Linda Knievel and Krystal Kennedy, 40, the former Florida State golfer who became Evel's caregiver and companion despite their short, rocky marriage.
Son of a bitch. Growing up, I used to love watching his old tapes and playing with old action figures my parents had that they let me play with. If it wasn't for Evel I don't think I ever would have gotten into skateboarding; OK, yeah I would but still it didn't hurt. You will be missed. Now try to jump over God on a rocket powered dog sled, Evel. Bones don't break in heaven.]]> Free Image Hosting at www.ImageShack.usWorld famous stuntman and daredevil Evel Knievel passed away on Friday. People Magazine reports:

Knievel had been in frail health for some time. Speaking to USA Today earlier this year, Knievel – crippled with arthritis, recovering from a stroke and aching from his decades of bodily injuries he’d earned while performing – admitted he no longer felt invincible, as he had in his youth.

“I think about God a lot more than ever,” he said, “though I used to ask him, ‘Help me make a good jump.’ I’m awfully tough to get along with, but I’ll tell you what: I am a good person. I wish there was such a thing as reincarnation.”

“If there is a heaven, I don’t know anything else I can do to get there,” he told the interviewer, “and neither do you.”

Among his survivors are sons Kelly and Robbie Knievel, daughters Alicia and Tracey, 11 grandchildren and ex-wives Linda Knievel and Krystal Kennedy, 40, the former Florida State golfer who became Evel’s caregiver and companion despite their short, rocky marriage.

Son of a bitch. Growing up, I used to love watching his old tapes and playing with old action figures my parents had that they let me play with. If it wasn’t for Evel I don’t think I ever would have gotten into skateboarding; OK, yeah I would but still it didn’t hurt.

You will be missed. Now try to jump over God on a rocket powered dog sled, Evel. Bones don’t break in heaven.

Similar Posts: ]]> http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/12/01/evel-knieval-dead-at-69/feed/ 0 New Bible Being Published http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/11/23/new-bible-being-published/ http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/11/23/new-bible-being-published/#comments Fri, 23 Nov 2007 12:46:34 +0000 Manny http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/11/23/new-bible-being-published/ If your pussy assed eyes can handle it, girly man, a new bible to learn and live by is being published. I suggest you don't look directly at it unless you want to become 50% less potent. Chuck Norris is hitting the hardcovers. Page 6 reports:
In "The Truth About Chuck Nor ris," out next week, author Ian Spector relates such crazy tid bits as: "A cobra once bit Chuck Norris' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died . . . Chuck Norris can impregnate women with only a glance. He can also do this to men . . . Chuck Norris only allows Jackie Chan to live because he likes Chris Tucker movies . . . When Chuck Norris breaks wind, it stays broken . . . Mr. T. once de feated Chuck Norris in a game of tic-tac-toe. In retaliation, Chuck Norris invented racism . . . When he is alone at night, Chuck Norris likes to wear slippers with bunnies on them. Real live bunnies."
I strongly suggest you have your heart meds handy because even in written form, Norris is lethal. Watch yourself, pussy. P.S. I knew that cobra, he chewed nails and bathed in HCL, what chance do you think you have? picture source ]]> norrisIf your pussy assed eyes can handle it, girly man, a new bible to learn and live by is being published. I suggest you don’t look directly at it unless you want to become 50% less potent. Chuck Norris is hitting the hardcovers. Page 6 reports:

In “The Truth About Chuck Nor ris,” out next week, author Ian Spector relates such crazy tid bits as: “A cobra once bit Chuck Norris’ leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died . . . Chuck Norris can impregnate women with only a glance. He can also do this to men . . . Chuck Norris only allows Jackie Chan to live because he likes Chris Tucker movies . . . When Chuck Norris breaks wind, it stays broken . . . Mr. T. once de feated Chuck Norris in a game of tic-tac-toe. In retaliation, Chuck Norris invented racism . . . When he is alone at night, Chuck Norris likes to wear slippers with bunnies on them. Real live bunnies.”

I strongly suggest you have your heart meds handy because even in written form, Norris is lethal. Watch yourself, pussy.

P.S. I knew that cobra, he chewed nails and bathed in HCL, what chance do you think you have?

picture source

Similar Posts: ]]> http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/11/23/new-bible-being-published/feed/ 1 Quick One: Reason 9484737393983948 I Hate James Blunt http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/09/13/quick-one-reason-9484737393983948-i-hate-james-blunt/ http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/09/13/quick-one-reason-9484737393983948-i-hate-james-blunt/#comments Thu, 13 Sep 2007 11:04:36 +0000 Manny http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/09/13/quick-one-reason-9484737393983948-i-hate-james-blunt/ Jimi HendrixFrom Contactmusic.com:

“I’d like to see JIMI HENDRIX cover one of my tracks but it’s probably not going to happen.” British singer JAMES BLUNT wishes he launched his career during Hendrix’s lifetime. 

James, I don’t believe Jimi knew the ‘pussy faced douche rat fink butt fucker’ chord progressions required to play your diabolical catalog of pain music.

Kill yourself you rotten fecal duct.

Did I mention I loathe James Blunt?

Similar Posts: ]]> http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/09/13/quick-one-reason-9484737393983948-i-hate-james-blunt/feed/ 0 American Gladiators Is BACK! http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/24/american-gladiators-is-back/ http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/24/american-gladiators-is-back/#comments Fri, 24 Aug 2007 11:04:46 +0000 Manny http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/24/american-gladiators-is-back/ Attention IT nerds who think you are tough. Are you ready to test yourself in the Eliminator? Do think you can handle the maelstrom of pain that is Turbo and Malibu reigning blows upon you with padded giant sized Q-tips? If your pussy ass, mistakenly, answered ‘yes’, Variety is reporting GREAT news for you:

The latest incarnation will follow eight gladiators — four men and four women — as they take on both male and female contestants. This time around, the participants will actually be given the chance to train for the various physical strength and endurance matches.

I loved watching geeks get snapped by twigs and the even too ridiculous for WWF interviews they used to have. I am pissed they are gonna let these dorks work out before hand.

If you have forgotten the pageantry & the majesty that was American Gladiators, check out this excellent video:

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Think you’re man enough to take on Malibu after that? Think again you anal fissure. Check out this reverse angle. Even if you can conquer the mighty Malibu, Bronco will step up to beat you down, pussbag. More evidence here:

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Similar Posts: ]]> http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/24/american-gladiators-is-back/feed/ 0 Goldenballs Lands In The Big Apple http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/18/goldenballs-lands-in-the-big-apple/ http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/18/goldenballs-lands-in-the-big-apple/#comments Sat, 18 Aug 2007 14:35:17 +0000 Manny http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/18/goldenballs-lands-in-the-big-apple/ GoldenballsThe David Beckham US Tour landed in NYC yesterday in advance of the Galaxy’s match against Red Bull New York on Saturday (aired nationally in the US on Fox Soccer Channel).

In his off time, he took the time along with team mate Ty Harden & New York players, ace striker Juan Pablo Angel and teen phenom Jozy Altidore, to run a clinic with disadvantaged youth in Harlem to teach them the finer points of the beautiful game.

Call him overexposed. Call him overrated. Call him whatever stupid things you want, but is it really possible to hate him? He shows up in every town and helps poor kids to learn the game of soccer (football) for free on his own time and gives them free equipment so they can keep on playing. The only thing left for him to do is save a puppy from a burning building while he’s running one of these clinics. Are you kidding me?

Well done, Goldenballs.

If it would be possible to mould some of those kids into future US superstars so we can maybe win the World Cup someday, that would be very much appreciated. Thanks in advance.

Similar Posts: ]]> http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/18/goldenballs-lands-in-the-big-apple/feed/ 0 Mr. Norris Has An Eye Job http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/16/mr-norris-has-an-eye-job/ http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/16/mr-norris-has-an-eye-job/#comments Thu, 16 Aug 2007 12:06:31 +0000 Manny http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/16/mr-norris-has-an-eye-job/ Chuck Norris Lord Chuckford Norris is in a new Pepsi campaign and according to the folks at Plasticized he got a little nip n’ tuck on his eyes.

Normally I would be calling a man the ultimate pussy for getting his eyes done and laugh my ass off at how vain and fragile said pussy was.

However, I for one value my life. I also value staving off armageddon; both would be in jeopardy should I ever speak out and use the Lord’s name in vain.

I salute thee, Mr. Norris. It looks fantastic.

Similar Posts: ]]> http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/08/16/mr-norris-has-an-eye-job/feed/ 0 9/11 & Katrina Hero, Jake, Dies http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/07/26/911-katrina-hero-jake-dies/ http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/2007/07/26/911-katrina-hero-jake-dies/#comments Thu, 26 Jul 2007 22:47:50 +0000 admin http://sithomeandrot.com/celebs/?p=379 Jakehero_dog
Jake, a 12 year old rescue dog, one of only 200 certified in the United States for the job, died of cancer.

Jake was adopted as a puppy with a broken leg and a dislocated hip. His owner took him in saving him from termination and trained him to become a world class rescue dog.

Jake was taken to the World Trade Center hours after they collapsed and frantically searched for survivors in the rubble. New Yorkers were so taken by the black lab in the little rescue vest, he was treated to a steak dinner at an upscale Manhattan restaurant and treated like a hero.

A few years later Jake helped find survivors of Katrina in Mississippi. He also trained a new generation of rescue dogs and help console child burn victims and seniors in assisted living to bring them through their darker days.

His final day was spent taking a walk through the fields near his home in Utah. He took a final dip in his favorite creek. Afterwards, he lay down in his lawn shaking and weak from the fever that had overcome his frail body and left this world.

No correlation between his work at Ground Zero and his cancer has been found, though his body was allowed to be studied to further research any possible link as many have been interested to see if any links existed.

His ashes have been spread in places that were important to, Jake.

I know that this page is 90% retards like Lindsay Lohan, Paris & Britney and their failings as human beings*, but I thought it was fitting in light of the Michael Vick debacle where dogs were treated ever so shabbily, to put it lightly, to honor an animal with more class, dignity and honor than many of the people who are featured in stories on this page could ever aspire too.

Jake is a true American hero and will be missed.

You can read the rest of Jake’s incredible story HERE

*during the week, on the weekends it’s mostly funny videos and odd stories but the same applies in most cases.

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