LA LA LAndmine » Music

Katy Perry In A Pink Bikini

Manny — Tue, 04 Aug 2009 09:23:11 +0000

Katy Perry has a fabulous rack.

Katy Perry has a pretty decent body.

Katy Perry still has some pretty shitty music.

However, let’s remember, Katy Perry has a nice rack. Let us also remember that nice racks look nice in little pink bikinis.

Thank you Katy. (for the pick not the shitty music.)

A few more shots after the break.

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katy perry’s music sucks but her rack does not.

Manny — Fri, 26 Sep 2008 05:14:46 +0000

Katy Perry sucks.

I mean, she really really sucks. Her music is heinous and obvious and she tries SOOOO hard to be outrageous.

One need look no further than her wearing a neglige to the VMA’s as a sign of desperation. Oh and her hit song that blatantly plays on the male fantasy of seeing two seemingly straight girls making out.

However, her spectacular rack will always assure her of a place on this page…until she goes downhill and starts looking heinous.

More after the break.

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jessica simpson upskirt the easy way

Manny — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 06:48:06 +0000

Jessica Simpson was on Good Morning America singing some hunk of shit song she sings I have no idea,

but she did have the good heart to give us a peek up her skirt the easy way.

No lo-angle shots.

No mirrors.

Just plain and simple not paying attention to a skirt flying up and around.

I kept it here rather than the dirty bird zone since it’s just an ass, c’mon.

Check out a few more pix of her ‘performance’ after the break.

oh and P.S., nice back fat, Jess. Time to hit the fucking gym huh?

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site update & the naked Swedish Crossbow team

Manny — Mon, 18 Aug 2008 09:42:53 +0000

So I have a ton of meetings and pre-production work on a demo I’m working on so posting will be even lighter than it has been for me recently. If it paid me, I’d be all over posting 19o posts a day like I used to. It’s just unfortunate that work started to frown upon me updated a blog while I was supposed to be pitching actors to casting directors.

It should be only this one week that is lighter.

In the meantime, did you know that crossbow was an Olympic sport? Neither did I.

Did you know that Swedish girls are insanely hot and have no problem being all kinds of nude on and off camera? Of course you did.

That’s why that news that a member of the Swedish crossbow team took nude photos and is hot is only shocking in that we learned about the crossbow event. Check out the outrageously NSFW pix HERE.

The girl’s name is Sara Boberg in case you actually gave a shit.

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viral spiral: world record-fastest guitarist in the world

Manny — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 08:21:33 +0000

This is just amazing.

I can alternate pick pretty fast, pretty cleanly. (at least 200+ bpm) but to play a fairly difficult melody like Flight of the Bumblebee at speeds at and above 300 bpm is just a physical feat to behold.

The video is fairly long. I’d suggest skipping over the intro if you aren’t interested in knowing his background. It is fun to watch him play the melody faster and faster.

Great stuff.

Congratulations, Mr. Dellavega.

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Hayden Panettiere-Wake up call music video/commercial for Candies

Manny — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 11:50:06 +0000

Hayden Panettiere has cut a new song and music video for Candies. (a shoe company she is sponsored by)

The song eats dong. Shocking right? But there is no denying she looks sexy. So I guess it’s a wash.

Check it out after the break.

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upskirt: britney spears shows the goodie box again…but wears panties?!?!?

Manny — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 12:02:07 +0000

Holy shit.

I never though I’d see tha day but perhaps Britney Spears is done being a total whorebag and is making a concerted effort to only be a half a whorebag.

I mean, if I was her sons I’d be happy if my mom decided to be half a whore. I think having a mom who is a train wreck whorebag slut has to be tough.

Look at these pix. She is wearing panties for once! Unreal. She FINALLY figured out that if you wear short skirts, and you have 400 paparazzi swirling around you from all angles, there is a good chance they’ll get the panty shot in on you.

Of course, it would also be nice if she learned that it’s a good idea to shear down the pussy hairs do they don’t burst out of the sides of her panties making it look like she has the proverbial Buckwheat in a headlock, but it’s a start. Baby steps.

The pix aren’t all that NSFW thus why they are being posted here. However, as I always say, if you are looking at this site (much less the sister XXX blog) at work, you probably don’t value your job all that much anyway since it’s basically a bunch of upskirts and chicks with giant melons all day I mean, c’mon.

A few more pix after the break.

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video: larry king this is christina aguilera; she is kinda ‘new’

Manny — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 11:53:07 +0000

Larry King is just a retard.

He had Christina Aguilera on his show to talk about the bullshit Rock the Vote campaign and prefaced a comment on her singing a song that is a ‘belting’ kind of tune and saying it was odd since she is known as a soft singer.

That of course drew an immediate response from Christina calling him a retard in a nice way.

For further illustration I’m and going to post a few more clips of Christina doing her thing that just show how dumb of a statement Larry King made. Check out more than a few instances of her stretching out her near 5 octave range below belting the shit out of songs, Larry. Dumbfuck.

I think you get the idea.

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hell awaits: heidi montag starts her own record label

Manny — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 11:44:42 +0000

I’m not going to write much about this. How much time to I have really? The pit of hell awaits.

The tabloids (People, US, NE, OK! etc) have been ablaze with stories about Heidi fucking Montag launching her own record label with a producer called “RedOne” (what is he a menstrual cycle?) who will help pen these masterpieces.

Fuck you world. I’m serious. This cuntbag gets a boob job, acts as annoying and fake as possible on TV and in ‘real’ life and gets a fucking record label?

There are people who have busted their ass and dedicated their LIFE to music and can actually read a fucking lead sheet (please define the term ‘lead sheet’ for me Heidi without looking at a dictionary) who will make $500 a week the rest of their life and this turd burglar is going to have her own record label.

Fuck you world.

Don’t get me wrong. I would fuck Heidi Montag retarded until she made Corky look like Albert fucking Einstein, but that is a whole separate issue from this abomination.

Do something useful for the world and come out with a fuck tape, sugar tits.

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Red Hot Chili Peppers singer Anthony Kiedis loves electric cars; apparently hates his kid

Manny — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 09:44:27 +0000

Red Hot Chili Peppers singer, Anthony Kiedis flexed his green muscles and took his rinky dink electromobile out on the town.

I dunno. I guess it has a certain retirement village cool cahet to it. However, it’s not exactly the way to scream “I’m a rock n’ roll rebel muthaphukkas!!” is it?

The bigger point that should be addressed is his Britney Spears like care for his child while in the car.

OK, I know these things top out at 35 mph, but that’s still plenty face enough where little jr’s face is going to be acting as daddy’s airbag.

Anthony: you are a fucking millionaire. Invest in a fucking car seat for your infant child. You little clown car has seat belts and can accomodate one. Beside that, it’s the law in California, moron.

Fuck, you can’t be that retarded can you? You did at least graduate high school.

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coldplay are a bunch of thieves and admit it.

Manny — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 09:45:34 +0000

So the post yesterday about the band claiming that Coldplay ripped them off might not be such a far fetched idea AFTER ALL:

“the world’s worst—but most enthusiastic—plagiarists. We’ll try and copy anyone.”

Uhhh…kinda makes those denials a little bit less meaningful there, Chris. Time to lawyer up there, chief.

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Jessica Simpson “real girls eat meat”

Manny — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 10:23:33 +0000

C’mon! This is far too easy. It’s like handing an 11 ft. tall guy a basketball and asking him to slam dunk it. She did 90% of the work for me.

Moving on…

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Coldplay might be a bunch of no good song thieves

Manny — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 10:18:27 +0000

So the media in the UK has been BUZZING with rumors that Coldplay ripped off their new song Viva la Vida from a shit band in NYC.

Now let’s get one thing straight here first, they sound similar. Now let’s get a second thing straight here, they both make my balls crawl up into my stomach by virtue of their sheer shititude.

I mean both of these songs really song donkey balls. Every fucking Coldplay sounds the same and this douche crying foul makes equally milquetoast generic fuckhole cunt rock as Coldplay do.

I mean, combining water and vinegar will always make douche, boys; and you all have massive supplies of both ingredients in your songwriting books.

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Ashley Tisdale doesn’t have AIDS…wait what the…?!?!?

Manny — Mon, 16 Jun 2008 13:33:10 +0000

So I don’t normally tag Ashley Tisdale stories in the ole RSS so the original tale of her contracting HIV when she went under the knife went unnoticed by me. Sorry. Well Star Magazine is reporting it isn’t so. They explain:

It all began on June 5 when blogs began picking up an unsourced “news story” that Ashley, 22, had been diagnosed with the HIV virus, possibly acquired from “contaminated equipment” used during her Nov. 30 nose job . And the hoax didn’t stop there. Soon, new reports claimed she’d developed AIDS and had only six months to live. Her rep soon shot down the story — telling Star it was “completely false” — but the damage was done and Ashley and her family are devastated.

You know a story is utter bullshit when Star is debunking it. Nothing against them, but they are an ass hair shy of Weekly World News and the National Enquirer on the upstanding journalism scale.

Of course that is to say nothing of the fact that it would be HIGHLY unlikely for someone to contract HIV and get full blown AIDS in roughly 6 months.

So fear not Tisdale fans, she will continue releasing shitty albums and making equally shitty TV movies..

…man the first time I kinda wished Star was wrong now that I think about it.***

A few more pix of Les Tiserable after the break.

***yes, I’m joking ass clots I don’t really wish HIV on anyone…OK, almost no one. But for sure not Ashley Tisdale.

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new meme exposed! The Ashley Tisdale Rick Roll: The Tis Roll is born

Manny — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 11:41:31 +0000

What in the fuck is this shit? (check it out after the break)

High School the Musical star, Ashley Tisdale is covering Rick Astley? Is she doing it as a joke? A clever nod to the Rick Roll? It worked in getting me to post it, but it doesn’t mean that I won’t also mention that she sings like a cat having its balls relentlessly beaten by a spiked club

Granted, the Rick Roll is old news now, but perhaps the newly dubbed Tis Roll (the first asshole who steals it without linking gets skull fucked) will catch on. It would be contrived and a bit stale but that’s about all this cover is worth because it is devoid of musical value.

‘Enjoy’ the song after the break.

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adnan ghalib risking death over Britney Spears sex tape

Manny — Thu, 05 Jun 2008 10:58:23 +0000

I can think of some better things to lose my life over, but Adnan Ghalib is apparently risking life and limb by allegedly holding onto a sex tape of him and Britney Spears which he is in the process of trying to release. The SUN UK reports:

“Yes, I was injured by an attacker. This is still being investigated. I can’t say much about the cowardly attack other than: a) you better come a lot stronger than that if you want to make a point and b) most will be surprised by those behind it. I have had many calls about it from all over the world. In light of the constant calls about the sex tape and threats, I’m taking a break from the industry and keeping a low profile.”

You think you got stabbed over a sex tape with Britney Spears that was made in the last 2 years and you continue to explore releasing it? C’mon, dude!

If this was Britney when she was 18-21 then yeah, I’d pretty much take bullets for that since you’ll be a billionaire and could probably have someone make you a bionic body with a crushing vice like grip that could destroy worlds.

For a tape made after she spit out a couple kids, went nuts and got fat as a whale…uhhh…you could probably get a Big Gulp and a day old hot dog from 7-11 at best.

Time to take stock of your life, chief.

Oh and what fucking industry are you taking a break from? You former ‘industry’ of stalking celebrities, getting in their good graces and fucking them? Or the industry of making sex tapes with girlfriends and publicly advertising that you will sell them to the highest bidder thereby ruining the business of taping yourself with your girlfriend’s for every other guy on earth, dick lick? I’m curious. Please explain in a 30 minute tell all on the Insider that I can summarize in 3 sentences later.

Thank you.

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upskirt: christina aguilera nearly shows her baby maker

Manny — Wed, 04 Jun 2008 12:11:15 +0000

Christina Aguilera has gotten hot once again.

However, I simply can’t erase from my brain that she has a kid.

Looking at her hoochie dancing and nearly showing her box to the camera’s prying eye, I can’t help but think about how I would smash my face into a bed of nails at 100 miles per hour if this was my mom.

Christina, I know it’s tough to admit especially at your young age, but you are someone’s mom now. This kinda shit is just kinda sad.

Seriously, once you have kids (man or woman) you are done with party boy time. You can do to boring assed dinner parties but the clubbing grind-a-thons are just sad at that point. You get one exemption on New Year’s Eve but that’s it.

Please, Christina, please…

More pix after the break (incl. the near upskirt).

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Britney Spears: Fat or Pregnant? You decide

Manny — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 12:23:52 +0000

So reports have been swirling for a while that Britney Spears is pregnant again. (why God, WHY?)

Well she is certainly looking more corpulent these days so it’s either a case of being on a strict bacon and Twinkies diet (which is sadly plausible) or her being pregnant (which is intolerably scary).

Check out the pic after the break and decide for yourself.

oh and I don’t wanna have a post that just straight up grosses you out so here is a little something nice to look at:

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ashlee simpson is having pete wentz’s baby

Manny — Thu, 29 May 2008 08:50:34 +0000

Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz have confirmed to friendorenemies.com that they are in fact having a child.

“While many have speculated about this, we wanted to wait until after the first trimester to officially confirm that we are expecting our first child. This is truly the most joyous time in our lives and we are excited to share the happy news and start our family.”

Can you imagine? This kid is either going to be the biggest douche bag on the face of the planet having 2 douche bags for parents; OR it’s going to be the coolest kid ever using the whole combining two negatives makes a positive theory.

Either way, neither one of these two should ever reproduce. Just sayin’…

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mutt lange cheated on shania twain with this?!!?

Manny — Sat, 24 May 2008 01:06:55 +0000

So there are reports from various sources that THIS is the lady Mutt Lange was cheating on Shania Twain with.

Now I am excited as hell that we get a side by side shot of them together in equal lighting to get a fair comparison.

Basically, it’s like seeing a super hot chick (Shania) standing next to a buck of dog vomit that a fat man with explosive diarrhea with a Taco Bell predilection just shit his guts out into.

I won’t tell you that her name is Marie-Anne Thiebaud since I just said all that bad stuff about her looks though.

Oh and she is 5 years YOUNGER than Shania. I guess this is one time going for the younger girl wasn’t a trade up.

Mutt Lange further proves no matter how hot the girl, there is a man bored with her.

Nice one, douche.

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Guess Who?

Manny — Thu, 22 May 2008 09:01:26 +0000

I figured I’d play a game with this one.

Guess who this quote is about:

“She’s like a master at what she does,” he gushes to the mag. “She’s a lot more experienced than most people. She just has the ‘it’ factor that not every artist has. So it’s always nice to work with her.”

I can’t even bring myself to type the answer as it is beyond absurd and will not dignify it with spelling it out. Total B.S.

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david cook wins american idol

Manny — Thu, 22 May 2008 08:53:08 +0000

I have no idea what I just wrote. I haven’t been able to watch American Idol in a long while. The show simply sucks and is the death of the music industry as we know it.

Did Cook deserve to win? Of course not. He’s on a fucking TV talent show and did nothing to earn his place.

There were a record number of votes cast as well.

Fuck everyone who voted.

Onward and upward…

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Jennifer aniston still fucking john mayer; still super hot in a bikini

Manny — Fri, 16 May 2008 12:48:55 +0000

How in the fuck does this continue?

How does John Mayer continue getting top shelf pussy? I know cash is a big lure, but when it’s a girl who also has a ton of money that lure is lessened.

His music sucks, mostly. (granted the blues albums have been a bit better) Yet, he is vacationing with Jennifer Aniston and banging the shit out of her. Is the apocalypse here? Who is playing this fucking joke on humanity?

I really need to get a case of Bells Palsy like him and rock on my guitar far more.

Oh and Jenn, you are almost 40 years old now? Really? Jesus Christ. Her body is hotter than a lot of 20 year olds.

I hate you John Mayer, I really do.

P.S. you better be taping these fuck sessions for future release on the sister site, Johnny.

More pix after the break.

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shania twain is single; time to swoop

Manny — Fri, 16 May 2008 12:23:35 +0000

Shania Twain and her husband of 14 years, super producer Mutt Lange, have broken up according to Reuters.

They of course have no comment on it at this time so I won’t bother quoting the article.

I just wanna say to Shania, I am available. Seriously.

I have seen her up close on the streets of Santa Monica quite a few times and she really is one of the most beautiful women you are likely to see. Pictures do her no justice.

Are you sad to see these kids split up? Or do you think she should go for an underemployed (re: flat broke), average looking, part time blogger, full time smart ass like uhhh…let’s say…me.

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britney spears and mel gibson on vacation in Costa Rica

Manny — Fri, 16 May 2008 12:14:55 +0000

So Britney Spears and Mel Gibson have been spotted in Costa Rica on vacation together…

…wait, what the fuck?!?!

Bizarro world ? Did I finally find you? E! reports:

Though the exact nature of the trip is not yet known, it appears to be nothing more than a friendly weekend getaway, with a source telling E! News the group departed from Los Angeles with the intention of hanging out at Gibson’s Costa Rica property “for a couple days.”

The source also told E! News the showbiz pair’s budding relationship has been nurtured of late by attorney Blair Berk, who repped Gibson in his infamous DUI arrest and who is currently representing Spears’ parents in their various legal entanglements.

More recently, Gibson has been described as “mentoring” the troubled pop star and that the duo has discussed “a getaway” of some sort.

OK, a few months ago they went to dinner in Studio City at an old people’s club, so it’s not unheard of for them to be hanging out together.

However, is Mel Gibson really the guy to be mentoring anyone? Granted, I think the guy was raked over the coals a bit more than he deserved a while back, but still, he still has plenty of his own issues.

What the hell am I talking about, I would go to Costa Rica with Mel Gibson if it was on his tab. Tropical vacation for free? He can talk all the crazy shit he wants.

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